Today I am returning to my usual blog and hope you are all feeling relief and some form of freedom is returning to us to raise our spirits. There may be a negative aftermath to this, but some counselling will help erate that. I had been discussing fear of failure,
Blog Archives
Your gut is your most important asset. Learn to be in contact with it.
In the last blog we were looking at the different types of intelligence we have. We may be strong in some areas and not so strong in others. I mentioned that emotional intelligence (the capacity to connect emotionally to another) was the most important. After all you would prefer to
There are nine types of intelligence and we all have our own unique creativity
Before I begin this blog, I would like to send my best wishes to all those people, who read it every week. I am very conscious of the awful plague that has us locked down and how stressful this is for many people. My prayer is that all of you
We must feel in control of our lives and it must be based on our intrinsic qualities not on external factors which can vanish
I do not advise self-help books, but you can get many useful books which will help you make sense of your life. A book you might like to read to help heal your perfectionistic tendencies is The Green Platform. This was written by Declan Coyle, who was fortunate enough to
Keeping a diary is a great way to manage emotional/psychological issues
Antony and Swinson (2009) detail many strategies and exercises for dealing with pathological (unhealthy) meticulousness. Their initial advice is to assess the seriousness of the perfectionism. You can do this by checking for the main areas where the problem arises. From preceding chapters you will have guessed that the most
A feeling of incompetence can lead to the controlling impulse
We have been looking at incompetence in the last blog. Unfortunately, it has been shown that feeling incompetent is one of the drivers for power and control, the basis for bullying. As the carrier of shame and a feeling of defectiveness, it drives the human to present a capable front
Incompetence is crippling and is an adjunct of fear of failure
If you suffer from a fear of failure, an exploration of your childhood role in the family might point to another root. Sometimes there is a natural order in these roles. Generally speaking, every member of a family has particular roles. The eldest child is normally the star or the
Teachers should ensure that their students are thoroughly instructed to ensure a feeling of competency in later life
Since parents are responsible for their children’s formation, including educational development, there is a lesson to be learned from the discussion in the last blog to ensure that the direction need is met. Most children must develop slowly in terms of learning, otherwise there is always a sense of unfinished
A feeling of incompetency pervades our thinking and behaviour
If you are not shown how to do things you may feel defective and a fraud, even if your achievements are noteworthy. The uninformed inner child binds you and you become afraid of change, avoiding new opportunities to enrich and give more meaning to your life. Petrúska Clarkson, who writes
If our dependency needs are not met, in adult life our inner child is crippled by fear
Jason continues his story about his crippling anxiety The course started and, unfortunately, old habits started to rear their head again when preparatory course assignments started. I started to skip some of the work that we were to do, and contributed nothing. I was lucky that the workload was small