Blog Archives

Welcoming our distresses is necessary and healing

One of the principal aspects preventing rehabilitation, and possibly forgiveness, is the presence of rage and anger. This anger is justified and must be vented, but, for the sake of our mental health, we must eventually let it go. Some of the techniques mentioned might help, but developing self-empathy is

Read More…

Posted in abuse, Leaving an abusive situation, Uncategorized
Tags: ,

Counselling helps you to understand what abuse really means

In the safe setting of counselling, you should be able to safely deal with the emotional impact of the abuse, and with thinking distortions, behavioural patterns, the spiritual losses, and loss in general. Feelings of shame, worthlessness, powerlessness, confusion, fear, and so on must be explored. The confusion that abuse

Read More…

Posted in Uncategorized

The Jekyl and Hyde nature of the controlling person keeps the other partner in the relationship

Religious beliefs and personal values are very powerful influences in shaping the decision to stay. St Paul did women no favours in his concept of female subservience to men, who may have been conditioned by the Pauline teaching to see themselves as being the authority figures. On the other hand,

Read More…

Posted in Uncategorized
Tags: ,

Cathal and I would have been very good friends

I have a strong feeling that Cathal and I would have been very good friends, and I feel a great loss in that also. In losing my child and my would-be friend, part of me has died. I have grieved losing part of myself, of seeing some of my characteristics

Read More…

Posted in Uncategorized

Anger and Misery

I was also enraged when a letter arrived addressed to Cathal. I opened it and discovered it was a bill from the hospital for the ambulance. I wrote an angry letter to the person who sent the bill. Now I am sorry that I did so. It must have greatly

Read More…

Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Death of a Child, Uncategorized
Tags: ,

The First Few Weeks

For the moment, however, we had to begin our journey of recovery as best we could. Our neighbours were at hand for the first few days. They had been immensely helpful, bringing food, making sure that those who came were fed, and generally keeping us company. I had the idea

Read More…

Posted in Uncategorized

when a child dies. footsteps of a grieving family. book available from veritas, amazon and bookshops

Only months later, when we were talking about that day in Dublin, did I connect it to the affliction that was about to visit our family the following day. My daughter, Breda, had a much more startling experience beginning on Friday 16th. She was living in London at the time,

Read More…

Posted in Uncategorized
Tags: , ,