This cancer eats my soul,
Even as I grow older.
I have not the gift of wisdom,
It is not possible.
I can give good advice,
I can see the problems,
I can offer solutions,
I am intelligent,
But my soul is contaminated,
The generosity of my spirit stifled in the stench of hatred.
Self-hatred.
From the cradle, I have carried this seed.
Forever blooming.
Manured by the fear of abandonment.
Never feeling good enough.
Soured by perfectionism.
Even as I grow older.
I cannot sooth the raging child,
And spray my shame even on those who love me.
Is this always to be?
Jim O’Shea
Despite conducting a deliberate campaign of hurt and control, those of you with abusive tendencies are likely to be shocked, if you are labelled an abuser. The first step in any decision to change is awareness, and that label must be applied to you without reservation, to begin the process of bringing about that awareness. As an abuser, you have a strong sense of denial, and you bury deep in your subconscious any recognition of your abusiveness. This is a defence against the pain of the vulnerable, hurt, child within you, so you will experience anxiety and fear as your awareness dawns, if you contemplate facing the roots of your abusiveness.
Adapted from Jim O’Shea’s book Abuse. Domestic Violence, Workplace and School Bullying published by Cork University Press
THERAPISTS IN TIPPERARY
PSYCHOTHERAPISTS IN TIPPERARY
COUNSELLORS IN TIPPERARY
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
ABUSE
DEATH OF A CHILD