One of the hidden ingredients that foment anger in school is rarely mentioned – being shamed. Shame sometimes forms part of the anger jigsaw, and hierarchical institutions are breeding grounds for it. I have observed this poisonous ingredient as a teacher and Principal for over thirty years, and as a primary school pupil long ago, when the school ethos was based more on power and inequality. There is a strange, almost subconscious, contradiction in school relationships, because while school is a place of formation and extraordinary hard work, shame can sometimes discolour that development. This was more evident in my childhood, and indeed for many years afterwards. Society itself was shame based in those days, and a culture saturated with shame was passed from generation to generation in many aspects of life. Poor people were obvious targets. As a historian researching the Poor Law, I was taken aback at Minute Book headings such ‘No. of lunatics/bastards in the workhouse’. You can imagine how people and children labelled in this shameful way were treated!
In my own small, rural school as a young child, I remember rows of dunce’s hats peering down from the tops of presses and small children standing in corners wearing these shaming badges. I recall shaming remarks made to children which would not be tolerated today. Yet, I doubt if shame has been eradicated from our schools. There is no reason to assume that teachers are no more or no less shame based than others, and their sarcastic and belittling remarks, especially in primary school, where children are most vulnerable, are particularly detrimental. Like parents, teachers make negative remarks to small children and, no more than parents, do not realise the damage that this causes. It is the great killer of creativity, creating doubt and confusion that ultimately may hold us in a barren place. The infant is the most creative of all people, mainly because she has not yet been exposed to a shaming environment.
Extract from Understanding and Healing the Hurts of Childhood. Publication 2018
THERAPISTS IN TIPPERARY
PSYCHOTHERAPISTS IN TIPPERARY
COUNSELLING TIPPERARY
DEATH OF A CHILD
ABUSE AND DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
FEAR
ANGER
JEALOUSY
CHILDHOOD DISTRESS
