Cathal was indeed a free spirit. A joy in our lives, as all our children are. For thirteen years he was part of our family in his human form. He is now part of our family in his spirit. He will always be part of us. He lives in our
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End of a continuing story!
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Cathal looked like mammy and Deirdre
The Cotoneaster tree will be another reminder of our child. Its white flowers in summer will remind us of how happy and innocent our child was, and the red berries in winter will remind us of the sorrow we felt when he was called away. For Mary, the drooping boughs
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
innocent, forgiving and forever smiling
I wrote a simple memorial poem for our lovely innocent child, which I read to bring our ceremony to a close. White blossomed sapling In the dark soil Forever rooted in my soul, Reminding me of my child Our child, Our brother. Innocent, forgiving, and forever smiling As the soft
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Planting a memorial tree helps our grieving
I am fortunate because, as a professional counsellor, I am obliged to attend a supervisor every few weeks. Mary, my supervisor, supported me whenever I felt I needed to talk about it. She suggested that I plant a memorial tree as a sign of acceptance. When she said this I
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
I hope this book will help bereaved people
Cathal’s death has also prompted the writing of this book. Perhaps it will help some bereaved people. If it does, then his death will have added significance and meaning. I was glad as I neared the end of the writing of this book. Despite its healing effects, I am not
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
we all have meaning in our lives
The meaning in the death of a child often lies in dying rather than living. As adults we find meaning in our religion, in our vocations, in our many relationships, in our philanthropy, and in our philosophy. But the impact of losing a child has an enormously greater impact on
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
how would I explaining the meaning of Linda’s death
Religious feeling and spirituality can be related to the search for meaning in the life and death of a child. But, parents and siblings who do not have any religious belief also look for meaning in the existence and death of a child. Following Cathal’s death, I became preoccupied in
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
a strong religious belief can help he bereaved
Apart from gender, how we grieve is also determined by culture, and, while not as prominent now as previously, religious belief is an intrinsic part of Irish culture. It was certainly a strong part of Irish culture in 1990, and it was deeply embedded in people like Mary and me,
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
men and women grieve differently
These symptoms and feelings are part and parcel of grieving, but the process is complicated by other factors. One of these is gender, and it was obvious that the males and females grieved differently in our family. The females clung together, talked and cried and consoled each other. There was
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
helplessness breeds terror
Anxiety is a common feeling associated with loss. It leads to unease, restlessness and hypersensitivity. I found this one of the most tormenting of the bereavement feelings. My senses were hyper-aroused; even the ringing of the phone rankled on my nerves. I was unable to rest or have peace of
Posted in Bereavement Grief and Loss, Complicated Grief, Death of a Child
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief
Tags: bereavement, Death of a Child, grief