unhealthy shame

It is comforting to know that toxic shame can be healed to a large extent; but one must always be watchful and aware. It generally requires a fairly long series of counselling sessions to adequately deal with it.I spent many hours exploring my childhood, relationships with my parents, the influence of the Catholic Church on me, my life in school, my behaviours as a parent and as a spouse, my behaviours as a friend, a colleague, a teacher, my time in a seminary, and so on. This was my story, and it obviously it took a long time to explore it, but it was worth it.Counselling always requires honesty, honesty is the very opposite of shame. To confront and defeat shame also requires tenacity, and it requires the ability to bear pain. As I said before, healing comes by revealing the shadow side of our character to a stranger (usually, counsellor/therapist), so that we eventually come to love all of ourselves, and not just the good side.